The man who might very well touch her in places I could only dream of. The man who might change everything. It was extremely tense and neither of us had much to say. I tried to ease the tension by playing her a tune on my guitar but that didn't go down to well. So in quiet we sat. In the end I plucked up the courage and knelt in front of her. I said that she must try to stay relaxed and that she must only do what she is comfortable in doing. I made it clear that if at any point she wanted to call it off or stop she only needed to say. I hoped this would help her relax. She smiled at me and kissed me. Then I finally added, "Don't be afraid to have a good time and don't hold back. If you feel like screaming do it. I want to see you having a good time." She smiled again but in her eyes I saw a look of doubt, as if she feared me seeing her enjoy it too much. Maybe she feared the outcome of the night more than the night itself. For all of our lives together this had been my raging. When it came to drying and jerking venison for storing, she was much better at it than me. Of course that would have been something she did from her earliest days, so it was more natural to her than to me.When it became obvious that I needed a new buckskin suit, I started work on it but Moxie took it away from me with one of her few grins and set to work. Three days later, I had a beautiful new set of buckskins that looked too good to work in — but I did anyway.One of the natural benefits of being near the South Wichita River was the presence of two particularly intriguing trees: the first was a huge spreading walnut tree while the second, just a bit smaller, was a native pecan. When the nuts began to ripen in late September and early October, we gathered every one we could keep from the squirrel population and hoarded for treats in the coming months. When we occasionally splurged on a cake or bit of homemade candy, adding the nuts was almost as good as finding gold nuggets — maybe.
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